I Forgive You
by JennaSPN
Summary: Dean struggled to forgive Sam for a long time. But they're brothers. And isn't that saying enough?  Sam and Dean fluff and some reminiscing of simpler times.  hurt/comfort


Disclaimer: I own nothing

AN: Just something short and simple. It's no literary masterpiece, but after watching a youtube video titled 'For Blue Skies' by theSPNvessels, and I sort of wrote this on a whim, just start and stop, over a couple minutes. I hope you like it, and I hope you see what I saw.

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><p>xx<p>

'Sam'

Dean was lying on his bed, arms crossed underneath his head, staring up at the ceiling.

'Yeah?'

'Do you ever miss home?'

Sam sat up a bit straighter and looked at his brother curiously. 'What do you mean?'

'Home.' Dean repeated. 'Do you miss it?'

Sam bit his lip. 'What home Dean? We never had a home.'

Dean chuckled sadly and turned his head to look at Sam. 'Yes we did.' He said firmly. 'I'm sorry you don't think so.'

_I swear it's like I'm fighting a useless battle with you._

Sam smiled suddenly. 'We had a hell of a car though.'

Dean grinned. 'That we did Sammy.'

Sam fell back on his bed and assumed a similar position to Dean's. 'You remember how pissed dad was when we got that toy soldier stuck in the door?'

Dean laughed warmly thinking back to that day. Dean had given the toy to Sam, and Sam had insisted that the solider have a proper seat in the Impala too. Cause he was a warrior just like them. 'Hell ya. It's still there you know.'

Sam nodded. 'Yeah, I know.'

Sam laughed suddenly.

'What is it?' Dean laughed too, because his brothers laugh was the goofiest he'd ever heard and because it was contagious.

'I was just thinking. You remember when we set off those fireworks? It was the fourth of July, 96, I think, and you- you surprised me with them.'

Dean swallowed thickly, touched that his brother recalled that night. For a long time after heaven he believed Sam didn't. 'Yeah- yeah of course I remember that Sammy. More than you know.'

Sam quirked an eyebrow. 'Dean?'

Dean shook his head. 'Never mind, it's nothing.'

Sam didn't look convinced but didn't pry. 'That was the best day of my life, for a long time.'

They lay in silence for a while, remising of better days. Days where there wasn't a constant lingering tension that loomed between them. Then again, Lucifer wasn't walking amongst them back then either.

'I do miss it Dean. A lot. I was just too stubborn to admit it back then.'

And Dean understood what he meant.

It was so complicated with Sam sometimes, and Dean wondered how someone could feel so much resentment and love at the same time.

But it wasn't the same as before. Because before Sam hadn't betrayed his own brother to a demon. Hadn't gone through with everything that he did.

It was a long year. And he missed Sam. _His_ Sam. But he was beginning to realize that not everything had changed. And his brother was still his brother.

He'd tried to forget about it so many times. Forget about heaven and what he saw. Just expel all the negative memories he'd collected and start afresh.

But that wasn't how it worked. Wasn't how life worked.

And though he wished every night that he could live more carelessly, and go back to the days where he'd look to his right and find Sam asleep on the passenger side of the Impala, his cheek against the window, his mouth stretched in a goofy grimace.

Back to the staring contests.

To the sparring matches.

To the arm wrestles.

To the movie nights.

And Dean knew that in a way it made him feel better to know that Sam was so guilty. It was written all over his face. But he couldn't allow himself to stay selfish anymore, because day after day he could see the self-loathing growing in his brother's eyes.

And to beat Lucifer, they had to be a team again, a real one.

'Sammy?'

'Dean?'

'You know I forgive you.' He turned his head to look at his brother, and Sam did the same. 'For everything. I forgive you.'

Sam looked taken aback for a moment, but Dean didn't miss the wetness in his eyes.

'I forgive you.' He repeated. Because he knew Sam would need reassurance. He needed reassurance too.

'I-' Sam's voice wavered. 'why?'

'because you're my brother.' Dean replied simply. 'I just needed some time, is all.'

'Thanks Dean.' Sam breathed, and his jaw was working away, clenching and unclenching, and he blinked rapidly. 'I'm sorry.'

'I know. I forgive you Sammy.'

Now all that was left for Sam to do was forgive himself.

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><p>There you are! Please tell me what you think. You're thoughts on that whole situation with the brothers, and do check out the youtube video if you have a spare moment.<p>

Reviews are greatly appreciated, they are great motivators, and I reply to them all.

Have a good April break everyone, religious or not.


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